Goop: Lifestyle Tips for People Who Are Too Good to Need Lifestyle Tips

So a couple of weeks ago--to the notice of pretty much nobody--Gwyneth Paltrow launched this bizarre shell of a lifestyle website called Goop.com.  Right now it consists entirely of a Flash intro and six icons demonstrating the sections that will (presumably) contain the site's content someday, although right now if you click any of them you get some stupid letter outlining the promise of things to come.  No explanation of why the site is named Goop is offered, although my guess is that it stands for Gwyneth's initials, GP, with two empty round holes in between to symbolize her dead, vacant stare.  (Clever design, actually.)

The first paragraph of this letter reads like a cross between a new age self-help manual and a Dick and Jane book--

--and goes on in that manner in an attempt to get us excited--via the most sanctimonious, Gwyneth-y kind of excitement possible--about Goop.  Excited enough to come back and check it our again when there is actually content, or whatever.

So anyway, back to those six sections I mentioned.  Here they are:

Make. Go. Get. Do. Be. See.  OK, Ms. Paltrow.  I get the vibe you're going for here--simple, minimalist, clean--but still pretentious and douchey.  To that end, may I offer a few suggestions for future expansion?  Once your site becomes the runaway success I'm sure it is destined to be, I say you build on those six sections and add a few more more.  My recommendations follow.

But I'm getting ahead of myself here--really, Gwyneth, I'll be happy with whatever you can throw me.  Teach me how to improve my life!  I await Goop's buildout with the bated-est of breath.

Comments

[Tony Buzan Videos]

thank you

[vero]

can you revisit this, please? i need your expert opinion to put my goop-loving opinion in its place.

[Stayreader]

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