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February 2007

27 posts from January 2007

Because Kelly Has Requested I Do More Posts with Crappy Pencil Drawings

This past weekend I saw the movie "Children of Men," which could have also been titled, "You Ruined the World.  Yes, You.  Now Nobody Can Have Any Babies, and Everyone is Sad," except that barely fits on a DVD box.  So they went with "Children of Men."

We saw "Children of Men" because the other choices were pretty underwhelming, and because I refused to see "The Departed" since it was 2.5 hours and I can't go that long without peeing.  The movie was interesting, but the experience of seeing it in the theater was sort of like sitting in a room for two hours and having someone scream "BE AFRAID! THIS WORLD IS GOING TO SHIT, AND IT'S GONNA BE IN YOUR LIFETIME, COOKIE!" over and over again with a bullhorn. Not how I usually wind down after a long week at work.

I don't go to the movies much in general, and when I do I hardly ever see anything but comedies or other light fare.  "Children of Men" (along with 2005's "V for Vendetta," the last big, dark drama I saw at the theater) is a perfect example of why.  I'm sure there are many people who like seeing movies like that in the theater for the same reason I don't--they're big and loud, and they suck you in and don't let you think about anything else other than their grim, sad premise. It's a tad overwhelming.

I'm not saying I won't watch movies like "Children of Men" at all; no, I just wait for them to come out on video.  If I'm going to have to sit through the apocalypse, I should at least be able to do my crossword.  In other words:


I'm saving my $9.25 for the next "Mean Girls" or "Bring It On."

Hand-to-Hand Combat

The pictures in this post come from this new photo set.

When we were out for our recurring happy hour date at Caddie's last week, Carolyn, Kelly, Elle, Lauren P. and I were delighted when two nice Bud Light people showed up to hold a preliminary round of the Bud Light Rock, Paper, Scissors tournament.  We had never heard of it before, but of course we were willing to try it, as entry was free and all participants were given a free bottle of Bud.  They informed us that the top two players would even go to regionals in April, and that the winners of that round would get to go to Vegas for free to participate in nationals.  We were not entirely concerned with these details though; we were more focused on the "free beer and Bud Light T-shirt" goal that we saw as vastly more attainable.

Kelly, Carolyn and I all won our first rounds.  After that Kelly and I had to face each other.  She beat me easily.  Carolyn took on Bender and beat him to advance as well.

For the win

Kelly and Carolyn each went on to win their next couple of games, and soon they were the only players left.  Here's Kelly's face when she realized she had to play Carolyn in the championship:

Kelly and Carolyn find out they have to face off in the championship

She was understandably a bit intimidated, as Carolyn can be ruthless at times.  Obviously it was too late to turn back, though.  The two squared off and threw down their first moves of the best-of-three series.  Carolyn took the early lead, covering Kelly's Rock with her Paper.

Kelly takes an early lead, but then Carolyn ties it 1-1 with a throw of paper
After that, Kelly won the second throw and the stage was set for a dramatic finish. 





It's down to the final throw; Kelly bests Carolyn and looks utterly shocked to have won

Kelly took Carolyn with the same Paper-over-Rock move that had been used against her on the first throw, thus taking the game and the tournament.

As the top two finishers, both Kelly and Carolyn advance to regionals.  Obviously I will be covering this momentous event for LMNOP Sports.  No matter what happens there, though, I would like to take this opportunity to salute my two friends and their RPS skills.  Ladies, you are true champions.

Livin' it up like the champs they are

This Week in Internet: Rhyme Time!

We'll start off with a math link, cuz that's how I roll,
And then switch to giant rabbits and their new Korean role.
Looking for Jesus? Try your freezer, or your dog door;
Or if you actually want to meet him, get killed by a sloppy doctor.

Top 10 Worst Domain Names, Top 100 Fonts,
Every special character that you could ever wantz.
Behind the scenes at O'Reilly/Colbert,
And what's with MySpace users and their awful, awful hair?*

I really enjoyed this story about crazy apartment neighbors,
And that D.C. has added onion to its many media flavors.
This is really funny, this is really gross,
This is an extreme account of bureaucratic woes.

The definitive list of Car Talk credits is available online,
And this look at inherently funny words is really Wiki-fine.**
Talk about your hovercraft in almost any tongue,
And go with your gut instinct cuz it's more often right than wrung***.

Open your eyes to the truth, but close them when you sneeze--
Does any other blog give you insights as valuable as these?!
I'm out of links and out of time so it looks like we are done,
But I'll see you all on Monday when the new week has begun.

*Thanks, Emily!
**Thanks, Doug!
***Wrung: A little-known form of the word "wrong" that is used to create rhymes with the word "tongue."

My Day, Breaking-News Style

BETHESDA, MD--Happy hour with friends and an episode of "The Office" were enough to redeem Lauren McMahon's mood Thursday after a neck ache and missed lunch initially caused her to regard the day as "crappy." McMahon, a 23-year-old Bethesda resident, decided late Thursday to upgrade her rating of the day to "pretty OK."

"Yeah, if it hadn't been for happy hour and watching TV, today would have really sucked," McMahon said.  "My neck kills right now." 

The neck ache, which came from sleeping in an odd position Wednesday night, caused her some delay in choosing her outfit this morning as she could not look for clothes on her floor or under her bed without significant discomfort.  As a result, she rushed out the door of her Bethesda apartment this morning without her lunch.

McMahon, who usually has good or OK days, described these two factors as the main reasons she initially felt like her day was a bad one. 

Later on, though, things turned up.  McMahon attended happy hour with friends Kellyq, Elle, Erin, Carolyn and Lauren P. at around 7:30 p.m. at a local bar. Despite having spent most of her day hungry and sore, McMahon said that this is when she felt her mood start to improve significantly.  Her friends noticed the change as well.

"We ordered nachos, which helped, I think," said Kellyq.

McMahon went on to converse with friends and other bar patrons for upwards of an hour and a half; afterwards, she went home to watch a rerun of "The Office" on NBC.  It was at that time that McMahon officially decided that her day had been "pretty OK" after all.

"Yep, it was pretty OK," she said.

As of press time, Ibuprofen and Biofreeze were of some relief to McMahon, but the pain was still very bothersome. 

An Inconvenient Truth

[My Gmail status message was that I wondered where dust comes from.]

it's dead skin cells
me: no way
       all of it
Ryan: i'm pretty sure like 98% of it
me: oh my god
       that is so disgusting
       i really might vomit
Ryan: ok, I was wrong, it's 70%
me: ok im still 70% vomiting
Ryan: i don't know what the other 30% is but I'm relatively certain it's no day at the beach either
me: hahahahahaha
       well, G-ask and you shall be G-answered
Ryan: g-ndeed

First Step: Admitting You Have a Problem; Second Step: Getting Rid of Some Lip Gloss

Last night as I was cleaning out my purse I finally came up with my Official New Year's resolution:

In 2007, I resolve to limit the amount of lip products I keep in my purse to five at a time.

I'm kind of a lip gloss/lipstick addict, and I have been ever since seventh grade when Katie and I would spend our entire 30-minute carpool trip in the backseat comparing Bonne Bells.  (We even had a game called "Lip Gloss Pageant," but I'll save that for another post.) Still, there is no excuse for what I found in my purse yesterday when I was cleaning it out; within that one bag there were 21 different lip products.  Witness:


(Note: I have annotated the above photograph here.)

That's insane.  I mean, I have clutter problems as it is, but when it's combined with my makeup addiction the result is utterly ridiculous. And what's worse is that I can justify the need for having just about every single one of those products in my purse. (Except for the two tubes of DuWop Lip Venom.  There's really no need for that.) 

I decided to whittle my collection down to four to give myself a little cushion; the other 17 would be banished to a box on my desk.  I agonized over the selection process, but eventually I had narrowed my "purse set" down to a ChapStick, two versatile shades of lipstick (MAC Delish and Clinique Butter Shine in DeLovely) and one lip gloss.

Friends, I am encouraging you to hold me to this New Year's resolution by performing lip gloss audits on me.  I am very serious about this; feel free to randomly challenge me to dump out the contents of my purse and verify that there are five or fewer lip products in there.  For every one over my limit, I will contribute $5 to the charity of your choice.  (In your name, so you look like the cheapskate who donates $5 at a time to charity.)

I Don't Get Out Much In January

364901922_85fbb38740 My social life slows down a wee bit in Jan/Feb because I coach basketball on Friday evenings and then referee bball games all day Saturday, leaving me just a bit exhausted.  However, I did manage to leave the house a couple times this weekend, and you know what that means: we got some new Flickr sets in the house, people.

The first set from the weekend includes the lovely picture at right.  About a year ago I posted a couple pictures of my friends and me at an event I referred to as "an art something thing."  We were, in fact, at a party/art show for O'Neill studios, and it turns out this is an annual thang because we went again this year.  Check out the photoset of Saturday's party here.

I also posted a couple pictures of us playing with Doug's new Wii.  That thing is mad fun. 

World Trip, Day Five


(Previously: Days one, two, three, and four)
Going to a beach for the last day of our world tour seemed like the only appropriate option, since jealousy over friends' beach trips was what inspired our travel in the first place.  Inspired by Michael Scott's vacation choice in a recent episode of The Office, we decided to pack our bags and head for Jamaica!  Well, Jamaica turned out to be a splendid choice, and we have spent our day drinking on the beach and making new friends.  Kelly even bought a new hat for her collection.


Going into this trip we thought we knew everything there was to know about Jamaica.  Guess what, though?  IWe was way wrong!  It turns out the following things are not true about Jamaica:

Jamaica has only been around for 14 years.  We had thought Jamaica was invented as part of the plot for the 1993 movie Cool Runnings , but whoops!  That's totally not true.  This is not a situation like how the NHL created a Mighty Ducks hockey team in honor of the movie; Jamaica existed way before Cool RunningsCool Runnings is, in fact, actually a true story!

Gwen Stefani is about as authentically Jamaican as it gets. Also false, believe it or not.  Despite the fact that she named her baby Kingston and has a history of wearing the colors of the Jamaican flag, Gwen is not even a Jamaica native.  Who knew?

Jamaica is a huge place. Considering its cultural reach (as determined by the number of people in college who had Bob Marley posters + the current popularity of Sean Paul), we had assumed Jamaica was a pretty big place.  Not so, mon. Jamaica is smaller than Connecticut!  However, when was the last time you saw people walking around wearing Connecticut flag wristbands and talking about how laid back and great Connecticut culture is? 

In short, Jamaica is awesome.  The people are great, the weather is fabulous, and it's not Connecticut.  What more could you ask for?

Kelly and I hope you've enjoyed reading about our world trip as much as we've enjoyed taking it.  We'll be back in Bethesda soon, but the memories of our travels will surely stay with us for a lifetime.  A LIFETIME.  Did you hear that, Elle, Carolyn, Emily, and everyone else who went on vacation this winter?  WE HAVE A LIFETIME OF MEMORIES, JUST LIKE YOU DO.  So there.