LMNOP

In keeping with the newly-announced LMNOPolicy of posting links whenever the hell I feel like it, here are a few things worth clicking--although I'm warning you now that they border on educational.

• An early wedding present to Jerome, from science: more evidence that dinosaurs are secretly birds.
• This so-called "best cure for hiccups" is suspiciously simple--could it really work?
• Human beings may have come close to extinction 70,000 years ago.
• Polar bears want to know if they're endangered, pronto.

Last week I was on the phone with Ben and he was all distracted, so I asked him what he was doing that was so much more important than talking to me.  He told me he was playing this game, so I checked it out and, well, I have to give him credit--Grid 16 is more fun than I am.  Add it to that list of bookmarks you go to when you're pretending to do your work.

Oh, and while we're on the subject of your job, here's another link: Dull jobs really do numb the mind.

That onesie in the last picture was a two-month birthday gift from me.   It was not available in adult sizes, or else I totally would have bought myself one too.  The design is so cute that I wouldn't even mind the whole crotch-snaps situation.

The weather was gorgeous on Friday and the dogs at the park celebrated in the only ways they knew how.  First, they were humping each other like crazy; additionally, they were running around like happy little maniacs.  It was so nice out that even the older dogs were running around, and pretty soon Pancake had somehow organized them all into a line behind him for a game of tag/follow the hyper-ass leader.  It was the cutest thing ever.

The action was so frenzied that almost all of my pictures from the afternoon came out blurry, but I kind of love them this way.  Even though his face is out of focus, you can tell exactly what Pancake is thinking: "OH MY GOD, THIS IS THE MOST FUN EVER."

Pancake still does not like baths.

No matter where you live, you've probably seen a license plate like the above, designating an otherwise normal-looking car as belonging to a police officer, veteran, diplomat, or some other such thing.  They are called organizational plates, and I for one see them all the time; rarely, though, do they excite me much.  However, I was driving to work the other day and I saw an organizational plate that truly impressed me.  It looked like this:

Now that is the kind of affiliation you want to brag about, vehicular-ly speaking.

I tailed the Barbershop Quartet Singer for a while, wanting to see if he looked like I pictured (handlebar mustache, vertical-striped shirt, suspenders, possibly in black and white), or if he was in fact en route to a barber shop.  The bad news was that he looked pretty normal and was just getting on the Beltway; the good news was that I was also getting on the Beltway, so following him didn't get me lost or make me late for work.

Anyway, when I got home that night I looked online for more information about the Barbershop Quartet plates and was sidetracked by the very interesting website of Andrew Pang, a Virginian who collects DC/MD/VA license plates.  I browsed his awesome lists of Maryland organizational plates and have come up with the following list:

The Top Five Maryland License Plates I Would Most Like to Have

5. Maryland Science Center plate

License plate with a dinosaur on it?  Want.

4. Optimist Club plate

It surprises me that they did not get a little more creative and throw a smiley face or something on this plate, but its bland institutional-ness kind of appeals to me.  It says, "Just because I'm in the Optimist Club doesn't mean I'm a cheese ball."  Totally true.

3. Square Dancing plate

 I keep trying to think of how to properly caption this or comment on it, but all I can think when I look at it is HELL YEAH.

2. Professional Disc Golf Association plate

Um, what don't I love about this plate?  It is the coolest thing ever. 

1. Ancient Order of Hibernians

 Apparently this is some sort of Irish fraternal organization, but it sounds cooler without the explanation.  I want to get this plate and make people think that I am part of some special tribe of humans who branched off from the evolutionary path and took up hibernation.  I could probably use it to get out of working during the winter.

Honorable Mentions:

American Massage Therapy Association

Um, sucio.  I get the feeling the person who owns this car works for one of those kind of massage places. 

La Leche League

Honk if you love breast milk.

Mayflower Descendants:

Poe's Crows Club

I'm not even going to Google what this is, because I don't want to be disappointed.  I'm just going to assume it involves re-enactments of Edgar Allen Poe stories.
 

Due to the current constraints of my schedule--constraints that had me running from room to room of a government building today collecting signatures and stamps from various officials like I was at some kind of bureaucracy-themed swap meet--my Internet-browsing time has waned of late.  This means that for at least the immediate, near-term future I will  be discontinuing my regular This Week In Internet recaps on Fridays and instead just posting links at random unscheduled intervals when I feel I've got enough to fill out a post.  Today will be the inaugural edition of this half-assed new format.

Los link-os:

• How to catch a Netflix thief
• Researchers now think they know what doomed the Titanic (other than the ginormo iceberg)
• The 10 typographic mistakes everyone makes
• 20 amazing weather phenomena
• The BBC reports: "A Russian man trying to sleep off a night of after-work drinking failed to notice a six-inch (15-cm) knife in his back - until his wife woke him up." (Thanks, Tito J. W.)
• Also from the BBC: "A man in New Zealand has been charged with using a hedgehog as a weapon, the New Zealand Herald has reported."
• How to make an anatomically-correct brain cake

Enjoy.  If anyone needs me I'll be sleeping off a stab wound.

First, I watched the Philadelphia Flyers beat the Caps in overtime to take Game 7 of the series and end the hockey season in Washington.

Then, I changed the channel to see the Pennsylvania election results roll in and breathe new life into Hillary's campaign, thus extending the already inexorable Primary season by another few weeks.

To recap, Washington in May will be made up of 0% exciting playoff hockey, 100% bitter, endless political assiness.

THANK YOU, CITIZENS OF PENNSYLVANIA.  YOUR TWO-PRONGED ATTACK ON MY LIFE WAS A RAGING SUCCESS.

Next car I see with one of these on it gets keyed.

Tuesday Morning Pop Quiz!  Who's better at rocking the sweatband?

Me:

Kelly:

Steev:

Pics are from this album of Saturday night.  Steev had a red sweatband in his pocket for some reason.