LMNOP

Soooo, this is gonna be me unloading a few pics/videos of chimps. Just warning you now. Don't expect it to somehow become more than that. It's just that yesterday I saw this--

--and bookmarked it, thinking it might be a good link for Friday. Chimp bloopers?! After all--chimp bloopers?! That's so internet!

Then, today, I got this IM.

Emily: and in other news, chimp wedding chimp wedding: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/gallery/2010/09/28/GA2010092802643.html?wpisrc=nl_most

Yes. Apparently there was a chimp wedding in China. I find this photo to be amazing:

Naturally, the picture led me to wonder if chimp weddings happen often. So I Googled "chimp weddings," and, for some reason, found this site, which might be the most amazing thing of all. (Link goes to a cached version of the page, because the actual site is kind of wonky.) I mean, look at this:

Is it just me, is this woman DEFINITELY a chimp pimp? I mean, we've got the following:

• Phrases like "once in a lifetime" and "close-up encounter" with a "young chimpanzee"
• Leopard print in two out of the three photos
• The facial expression on that bottom chimp

And, I just . . . I don't know anymore.

Ah, the disturbing truths we encounter when we dare to Google chimp matrimony precedents.

I guess something happened over to the left that made everybody happy.

And the Word of the Day of the Week is . . . frabjous.

So, here is an old training video for people who are going to wear the Chuck costume at Chuck E. Cheese. It had me from the phrase, "Let the enterTRAINment begin!"

Your '90s childhood in 94 seconds.

This was cute. So was this.

Hey, Biggie, what did you think of Inception?

The instructions you didn't know you needed till you saw them: kid-sized Ferris Bueller knit vest.

Hipster superheroes, hipster leaves, hipster dinosaurs.

Yo, the Kosmoceratops is crazy-looking. (thx, Adam)

An interview with Miss Blankenship!

That's all. Have a good weekend. One thing you should probably not do is mix potassium chlorate with red gummi bears.

Is it just me, or is Post Secret ridiculous sometimes?

Today, someone posted a comment on a post I made five years ago about the five things I am afraid of. I have decided to update you  regarding my thoughts on those five topics.

1. Horses.
STILL SCARY

2. Dakota Fanning

STILL SCARY

3. Stories about when people don't get enough anesthesia and they feel the whole surgery but they can't move or scream

STILL SCARY!

4. Purple eyeshadow

I might be coming around on this one.

5. Poor font choices

NEVER.

Another one from the park.

Taken at the dog park last week. September weather is the best dog park weather of the year!

Biggest news story of the week: CAT BORN WITH THE WORD "CAT" ON IT!

In addition to being my favorite karaoke song ever, Snoop's "Gin and Juice" apparently makes for an excellent spoken word/meditation track. Who knew?

The zorse picture alone makes this animal hybrid article worth checking out.

Great list of 10 films Ebert hated, complete with some of the choice zingers he leveled at them.

Tumblr of the week: Sorry I haven't posted.

THIS is how to win at answering hate mail. (thx, matt)

Neato typographical map of the U.S. Maryland looks funkay.

Holy crap, what are these marvelous things?

And now, I'm off to Pittsburgh for my cousin's wedding!

OK, please don't tell me I have reached my Saved by the Bell-referencing quota for the week, because I have something else to share. This all started last week when I was watching Part I of the Top Chef finale (don't worry, no spoilers). The finale took place in Singapore, and for the elimination challenge they had to cook and serve food at a place in Sentosa called the Tanjong Beach Club. While the challenge is going on, we see the waiters for the challenge all lined up like this:

(screencap grabbed from bwe)

And I was like, "WHOA. Is 'Tanjong' Chinese for 'Malibu Sands?' Because between the striped polos and the beach club situation and the standing-in-a-line, I just got the strongest SBTB-ja-vu everrrr." I wanted to point this out, but unfortunately, after some Googling, I could not find the exact SBTB screencap I was looking for to complete my visual analogy--that is, until today. This morning, I was randomly browsing the Internet and came across this list of funny Saved by the Bell screencaps, which were sourced from this blog, LOLSlater. And after scrolling exactly halfway down the page at LOLSlater, what did I see? This:


THE EXACT SCENE I'D HAD IN MIND exactly one week ago when I was trying to make my Top Chef-SBTB comparison! I was/still am extremely mentally soothed to be able to close the loop on this comparison. All I had wanted was to be able to put those two pictures side by side, chuckle lightly to myself 2-3 times, and go on with my life. And now I can.

Our internet is a kind internet.

Fake Toms. Finally, something for those of us that like the look of Toms, but don't want to help children.

(Yes, I am reposting my own tweet, cuz I DO WHAT I WANT.)

After seeing these today at lunch, I thought it might be fun to think of an even betterworse business idea than fake Toms. The best I could come up with was selling a bunch of those awareness wristbands and then donating all the proceeds to one of the Captain Planet villains.